Facing the Fats: MeMe Roth

Passionate and driven by tragic obesity in her family, MeMe Roth wants us to wake up and change our lives.

by Fitsmi Staff

As a concerned mother and founder of National Action Against Obesity, you've been a real media presence on CNN, Bill O'Reilly, Fox, and more -- and have gone to what many claim are militant lengths to raise awareness about and combat an obesity epidemic in this country.  Why exactly have you taken this fight on?

Funny to call me a militant, as I'm actually pretty moderate. My belief is that if we eat right and exercise daily, most of us would fall within the wide spectrum of healthy weights. Except for rare medical conditions such as Prader Willi, Cushing's Syndrome, and Pica or Prednisone use, most obesity is the result of habitual improper eating. And yes, BPA, environmental pollutants, bacterial imbalances in the gut, deleted genes, certain viruses, etc. exacerbate the problem. But before you convince yourself that you’re part of some “rare” category, eat right and exercise one hour a day, everyday, for a year and see what happens.

As far as "eating right," that's based on your own body's nourishment needs and the demands of your day. Generally though, go for a non-starchy, non-fried, mostly plant-based diet. Choose water over any sweet drinks. There have been some interesting new revelations that some folks are particularly sensitive to refined carbs like breads, cereals, cookies, crackers, bagels, pretzels, etc. And some people are super-sensitive to saturated and trans fats. Try to select from lean proteins like beans and skinless chicken, complex carbs like veggies and berries, and modest amounts of heart-healthy fats like avocados and olive oil.

And sorry to be a nag, but don't forget to knockout that hour of exercise!

I've taken on this fight because it's the natural collision course of my professional career in marketing and PR and my personal passion for preventing anyone from going down the heart-breaking path of obesity that I've watched the people I love and respect go down. Some people are new to obesity. I am not. I've had a front-row seat watching obesity steal the health, well-being, and quality-of-life from my mom, dad, grandmother, aunts, and uncles. I don't want anyone else to suffer in the purgatory of chronic disease where obesity holds you, especially not my children. I know it's incumbent upon me to break the obesity cycle in my family for my own benefit and for that of my two children. And even with all that, I find it damn hard to keep myself at a healthy weight. I'm not deaf to the siren's call of double-fudge Milanos, cookie dough, or Reeses Peanut Butter Cups...

Speaking of fights, does this have to be a fight or a war, and if so, why?

Let me know when we take this issue seriously enough to call it a war. The only war I've witnessed is obesity's war waged upon so many American bodies--and so many of them children.

You coined the term "secondhand obesity".  What exactly does that mean?

Four generations.

We have to question the very cultural memes that have ushered in this era of obesity--the status quo. Otherwise we create a self-propagating cycle of obesity--or "secondhand obesity," a term that I shamelessly stole from tobacco legislation—a disease passed along from one generation to the next. Did you know that half of today's pregnant women were already overweight or obese before they conceived? Those babies already are at a deficit health-wise before they draw their first breath.

Are you suggesting that if I'm obese, I'm a liability not only to myself and society in terms of my future health bills, but to my family and friends?  Is obesity contagious?

Studies confirm that obesity passes among social circles, especially best friends, but also spouses and siblings. The good news is that what's really spreading is are the eating and exercise habits that lead to obesity. Since that's the case, good habits could spread among those same social circles. We've seen cigarette cessation travel that way. Obesity in the U.S. comes with a $147 Billion dollar price tag. We're all paying for it. Employers are paying at least $45 Billion annually toward employee obesity.

Adults have the right to do whatever they want with their bodies, with the caveat that they also are responsible for the consequences. According to a recent Reuters article, only eight percent of Americans eat right, exercise regularly, don't smoke and don't drink to excess.  Eight percent!  We're not even trying.  Most of us are living a DNR lifestyle, yet expect heroic efforts the moment trouble kicks in. America is in the throes of an obesity bailout.  Listen, if you're incapable of living a healthful life and providing an environment of nourishing foods and regular exercise, then you should reconsider becoming a parent until you are. It's one thing to abuse your own adult body, but quite another to compromise the health and well-being of a child.

Would you let your child have a playdate/spend the night at their overweight friend's house?

I've never considered another child's weight as criteria to have or not have a playdate. Now, if the kid's a total brat...

Why do you think rates of eating disorders have risen at the same time as obesity rates in this country?

Eating habits that starve a person or send them into obesity are both disorders. It is no more glamorous to eat yourself into organ failure than it is to starve yourself into organ failure. Devastatingly, we lose up to 200 lives annually to anorexia. Any unnecessary loss of life is tragic. To put that into perspective, we lose some 600 or more American lives to obesity, everyday. If we want to prevent disordered eating, we have to teach children from day one how to properly nourish their bodies and strengthen them with exercise. Instead, we hook our kids on junk food and deprive them of essential daily exercise. According to the Department of Agriculture, 40% of the calories served to children are of low or no nutritional value.

As a society, as parents, we've failed our children miserably. Then they hit puberty and their eating and exercise habits are in unforgiving conflict with their hormonal drive to be attractive. So what do we do? We tell them to "love their bodies..!" (Ironic, since we haven't shown them how...) We practically demand it these days. I feel bad for the girls forced to recite false mantras of positive body image. But it makes parents feel better. Of the percentage of young women dissatisfied with their bodies, how many are really wrong? Everyone would benefit if we'd get it right in the pre-pregnancy-to-age-five stage when eating habits, exercise patterns, and body composition are being set.

And for Zeus' sake, please hook your kids on water instead of soft drinks, sports drinks, or juice. Kids are drinking hundreds more empty calories daily today than  they ever did decades ago.

At what point on the overweight-obesity spectrum should a parent become concerned?  If their child is overweight but not obese, should parents intervene, and how?

Yes yes yes..! Prevention is the game. But if you've missed that, correct course ASAP. No matter where your child is bodyfat-wise, you must get him or her into a life pattern of at least an hour of exercise everyday, drinking water over any other sweet drink, and eating a non-starchy, non-fried, mostly vegetarian diet. Not a party? Who said it would be?? This is about saving your kid's life. If I were a fat kid today, I'd be pretty pissed off at Mom and Dad as soon as I figured out that they kept feeding me what I wanted instead of what I needed.

What do you think of Peggy Orenstein's "studied unconcern" vis a vis her daughter in her recent NYT article "The Fat Trap"?

Good grief, she's making basic parenting too hard. You keep it all matter-of-fact. You give your children the age-appropriate pros and cons of food and exercise choices. And then you assume your role as the bleepin' boss of the family. Period. You set bedtime. You set TV time. You decide what is and isn't okay as far as foods consumed.  You better get this right as early as possible, because it certainly gets trickier as children get older.

There is a lot of confusing information out there about weight loss, a 60 billion dollar industry in U.S.  What are the most trusted resources, books, and websites that you direct parents to?

Shape and Women's Health and Fitness magazines all have great recipes. They're geared toward women who are active and interested in tasty, nourishing foods. Plus, they give the calorie counts. As a basic ballpark, multiply your healthy weight times 10. That gives you a starting point as to how many calories you should consume in a day (and what number to not go below). It's not very many. Certainly not enough for me!  So I run four miles everyday, walk gobs and gobs, and do all sorts of incidental exercise like climbing stairs and standing instead of sitting whenever I'm on the subway. That total effort earns me 400-600 calories.  I'm 5'6" and I like to stay in the low 120s. That means I likely consume about 1800 calories on a regular basis. It's easier to keep an eye on calories in NYC because calories are posted on most chain restaurant menu boards. I've been a vocal proponent for calories and nutrition information being posted on menu boards across the country. An informed customer has the opportunity to make better choices. Plus, I'm a big fan of industry transparency. Tell us what we're eating, what's in the food, what the risks are... and then let's make our choices. And don't forget, we're accountable for those choices.

If someone seems to have disordered eating issues, I immediately provide helpline information or inquire if they're under the care of a physician or therapist. And for those struggling with their weight, I frequently send folks to Overeaters Anonymous. www.oa.org.  It follows the 12-step AA type program.

What are some of my secrets?

My all-time favorite meal is the Vegetarian Burrito Bowl at Chipotle. You have to choose wisely though. Obviously, you can't get the wrap, sour cream, cheese, more than a touch of rice, etc. But I load up on black beans, veggies, tomatoes, salsa, lettuce, a tiny bit of cheese (and I mean tiny), and a small mountain of guacamole. Truly, I load up on that guac. (I mentioned the daily exercise, right??) Guacamole is high in fat, but it's a brain- and heart-healthy fat. And sooo delish.

If my day is really busy, if I'm traveling or up particularly early, I like a small bowl of steel-cut oatmeal with sliced almonds, raisins, a pinch of brown sugar and a little bit of skim milk.

Also, I'm big on desserts, which I really have to keep in check. Thankfully, I've found my eating and exercise habits allow for a little treat just about every day.

As for books, I really like Dr. Oz's You on a Diet as well as Judith Beck's diet books and Connie Bennett's Sugar Shock.  And David Kessler's End of Overeating is an eye-opener as far as how neuro-chemically dependent we've become on food as our primary source for dopamine-driven opioid highs. Of course this is no new news to food makers and marketers. They're investing big-time in neuro-marketing techniques. They've got gobs of fMRI scans telling them just how to formulate, package, and market food to light up every corner of our brains...

You've been an activist in your local school against the cupcakes, candy, and junk food served at special occasions, as well as a thorn in the site of the Girl Scouts for their cookies.  Do you think schools and parents should ban treats all together, or just cut back on the quantity?  If the former, don't you worry that kids never exposed to treats might never learn how to moderate themselves or make their own choices?

Every kid in America gets plenty of opportunities to consume junk food. But we shouldn't confuse school with Chuck-E-Cheese. The default at school must be health and safety for all children. And any substance served to children during the school day should promote concentration, good behavior and academic performance. Instead, it's too often a non-stop parade of ADHD-inducing artificial food dyes, artery-clogging trans fats, and enough sugar to spike insulin, mess with triglycerides, and then make kids feel hungry an hour later. I have nothing against anyone consuming party foods at parties. But sorry folks, school isn't supposed to be a party. And it's criminal that school lunch is nothing more than warmed-over subsidies.

To reiterate, kids who eat right and exercise daily can enjoy occasional treats without much consequence to their health. But school isn't the right venue for junk food. And if none of us brought it in to the school, no child would feel deprived. Kids are pretty adaptive. Are parents?

And the time for little girls to be the frontline selling 200 million boxes of cookies to the tune of $600 million in just two short months, all under the guise of "charity," is O-V-E-R. You can't claim "community service" if you sell the community more of what's already making it sick. Put the cookies on the grocery shelf next to all the other junk food and leave the little girls out of it. Let them come up with health- and earth-friendly ways to raise money. The Girl Scouts promises future entrepreneurs, right? Let's have them follow the girl scout motto of “making the world a better place.”

MeMe's grandmother today: "hasn't gotten out of bed in 2 years, in 24-hr care home. Maybe she knows you, maybe she doesn't. Once a fiesty, funny, voluptuous Southern Belle, one of the wittiest conversationalists ever."

How should Moms respond if their teen daughter becomes overweight?

Look Mom, it's your fault. You were her advocate. You were supposed to teach her survival skills. You were supposed to teach her how to eat, exercise, and love her body. Be honest: who brought the junk food into the house? Gloria Steinem says "the truth will set you free... but first it will piss you off." Now that you're good and pissed off, take that anger and get busy.  Regardless of just how overweight your daughter is, the remedy is the same:  providing good food, insisting on daily exercise, not blaming her, and promising not to make her say she "loves her body" just to make you feel better.

You have to create the most "best odds" environment you can. That means no junk food comes into the house. That means no constant nagging or dwelling on the topic of food. That means always offering a thousand different ways to get your daughter moving. That means you sign her right up for some kind of sport if she's dropped out by now like most teen girls. The entire family has to participate in a sea change when it comes to food and exercise, not just your daughter. You'll all be drinking water without complaint. You'll all be going on bike rides, taking after-dinner walks, and playing on the softball team without complaint. You'll all stop frequenting the ice cream shop, the donut shop or the million-calorie-indulgence shop without complaint. You owe your daughter the safe and healthy environment she should have had all along. If she needs special counseling, get it. If she needs all of you to join OA.org with her, do it. Again, without complaint. You're kidding yourself if you think you can ship her off to fat camp and they'll fix all the problems you installed. I know I know. You're pissed off. Use it.

In the years since you've taken on this battle, what have you learned?  Have any of your positions changed and, if so, why/how?

The worst thing I've learned is that educated, loving parents feed their kids crap. They do it for the simple reason that kids love it. And society doesn't challenge them. I had a loving, MIT-grad mother telling me just why she HAD to serve her son Coca-Cola: He's three years old! People know more than ever about nutrition and the dangers of junk food, yet how many parents do you know who think nothing of offering children Coke and Sprite?

But Michelle Obama is making major waves. And Jamie Oliver is making major waves. And there are hundreds of thousands of Michelles and Jamies in communities all over the country fighting the same fight. It says a lot about our country that we've let it come to the point where 30% of our children are over-fat, where 30% are expected to develop type 2 diabetes in their lifetimes, where 50% of children of color are expected to. That isn't the kind of country I can stand for. And I know many parents feel the same way. We can prevent obesity for the next generation if we're willing to. And we can lessen the blow for those already struggling, again, if we're willing to.

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Learn more about MeMe and her campaign at www.actionagainstobesity.com.  You can also follow her updates on Twitter and Facebook.

  Published May 4, 2010